I have now officially entered my 36th year and I contemplate what I have learned at this point in my life. As a young girl, I always wanted to be in my thirties. I always felt older and wanted to be taken seriously. Now, at 36, I am taken seriously as I always wished and now I often wish to go back to the days of being the young girl...longing for the days when you laughed until you cried, when you only had boys to worry about instead of kids. No, I don't really want to be a teenager again but why do we always want to get to another point in time? Why don't we just always enjoy where we are and what we are learning now? To relish in the simple act of life itself and living in the moment, not longing for the moments to come or the moments that have passed. So, I reflect ....what has my 36 years taught me .....how has my 36 years on this planet made me older and wiser? What do I know now that I didn't know then?????
1: You don't ever think your butt or thighs look good in the present, it is only looking at yourself in the previous years that you can appreciate how you looked then. At 13 and 102 pounds, I had a smokin hot bod and I thought I was FAT???Gees....if I only I could go back and appreciate it then. What I wouldn't do to have THOSE legs now! I am sure that at 50 I will look at my pictures now and think the same thing. I must start to appreciate the body I have now and stop looking at the 20 somethings in the gym longing to have those buns. No......I will not have the 20 year old body again. Lesson learned: Move on. Get over it. I am not 20.
2: The people that I admire the most are not the ones who look the best or wear the best jeans, they are those who remember others, who take the time to make time for those around them and are not so self absorbed in themselves. They are the most beautiful. They are the ones who I want to be like. Lesson learned: A girl is cute in designer jeans, but a woman is most beautiful when she wears them while bringing dinner to a neighbor.
3: Motherhood is a whole lot harder than I ever thought when I was the young woman dreaming about those sweet little babies I would someday hold alongside my perfect prince charming. However, I also never thought that sitting all night in the ER holding those little babies with pure exhaustion and worry could end up being the most tender moments with them, that being woken up at 1:06 am with two children simultaneously throwing up on their carpets crying for mom would be one of the moments I would remember as realizing that yes, I am the mom. I am the one that they want over anyone else and somehow I feel honored to clean up their puke. It is those moments that seem so hard that you can feel the most loved.
Lesson learned: Motherhood is a badge of honor and is made more precious by the most trying times in life. Relish in the every moment. Appreciate it all.
4. It is important to put yourself first on the list. Get up, get dressed, make yourself pretty. When you feel good, you have more to give. If we always take care of everyone else before our selves, all the time, we can crack. Lesson learned: Enjoy a good piece of chocolate cake , buy a cute new shirt and go to the bathroom by yourselves without the two year old banging on the door now and then. Sanity.
5. Yes, it is true, children do grow up so fast. You never think they will when you stay up all night with the newborns, but you blink and they are starting their first day of high school. Where did time go? Why did I want them to grow up? You get so excited to be able to sleep through the night again only to get teenagers who keep you up to all hours of the night. Lesson learned: Sleep is overrated. Hold on to them every minute because the minutes are going to be gone and you miss the nights that you sat up with them instead of getting the good night sleep that you longed for.
There are so many more lesson's that I have learned in life, those are just a few. I look forward to the lesson's that I have yet to learn in my life and appreciate the one's I have learned so far. Yes, each year I do get older and wiser too. I don't appreciate the new wrinkles I am getting or the fact that I had to color my hair again today after just three weeks because of all the gray hairs I have, but....I do appreciate the fact that those gray hairs have been earned from the trials in my life that I have overcome and triumphed over. Life is tough but in my 36 years, life has given me so many wonderful memories and experiences. For all of you who have been apart of that, I thank you for being in my life. Here's to another great year!